Archive for October, 2010

Ask pro wrestler Bull Pain

October 27th, 2010 1 comment

Pain hurts so you don't have to. Problems got ya down? Ask pro wrestling's Bull Pain!

Professional wrestler Bull Pain is here to answer your questions about life and love. Don’t just sit there, you pencil-necked geek. Take life by the horns–ask Bull Pain!

Dear Bull Pain,

My wife is dragging me to a Halloween party this weekend. Even worse, she’s rented these god-awful costumes…an over-sized Heinz Ketchup bottle (me) and a mustard jar (her). Unless I come up with a better idea, I’m stuck with this shit. Any ideas?

–Scared in Scranton, Pa.

Bull Pain: First of all, my wife doesnt drag me anywhere. We discuss things and make decisions together. If it’s cool and i feel i should or would like to go, then it’s time to party. But to be drug to a party that i have no interest in? It’s not going to happen!! And then to be told i am wearing a lame costume like that. Yah right!!!! That would be the day. Cmon man show her you got some stones between those legs and just say no–in fact Hell No!!! There are literally thousands of things i would rather dress as than those two lame ideas. All i can say is if you go to this party and wear one of those outfits you might as well check your grapes at the door.

Dear Bull,

I wouldn’t say I get blackout drunk every weekend–but I don’t always remember everything. My girlfriend’s all pissed off because I got us thrown out of a club last week and now she wants me to go to AA. I told her that’s just what guys do…boys will be boys. What do you think?

Dave R., Los Angeles

Bull Pain: Well Dave, it sounds to me like you have a serious problem. I can honestly say i have never got so pissed up that i even got close to blacking out or cant remember what i did the night before. Sure i have been asked to leave several clubs in my lifetime and i am sure i will be asked to leave several more. But i have never acted like a total moron when i am with my woman. This is not only embarrassing for her but shows me you have no respect for her at all. If you did you would never put her in such an embarrassing position of having to apologize for you not being able to handle your alcohol. And as for this is what guys do…i think NOT!!!! If you consider showing your ass and acting like a complete moron, then getting kicked out of a club to be “what guys do” then you really need to reevaluate why you even go out. If all you do is go out to get so drunk that you cant remember what you did the night before then why even bother. Going out is supposed to be to relax, have a good time, and hang out with your friends and loved ones. But if you cant remember then what’s the point. You might as well just grab a bottle of Jack at the house and drink till you pass out in front of the t.v. watching Green Acres reruns. At least then you wont embarrass your woman. This situation sounds to me like you really need to grow up and learn to drink responsibly not act like your a 18 year old kid getting drunk for the first time in his life. Look in the mirror my friend and realize it’s time to grow up!!!!

Pro Wrestling (Crudely) Illustrated

October 26th, 2010 No comments

Neal Snow, belt-maker, cartoonist and all-around babyface, illustrates some of the great–and not-so-great–moments–in wrestling history. More to come later this week so check back early and often.

Joe LeDuc takes a blood “oak” (oath) on live Memphis wrestling TV in 1978. For the back story on this memorable unscripted moment of Memphis mayhem, click here.

Batman has a showdown with the SuperKing while announcer Dave Brown tries to keep a straight face. For the scoop on this classic ’70s Bat-moment on your favorite Bat-channel, click here. (No word on whether or not the hubcaps were stolen off the Batmobile while it sat parked outside 1960 Union Avenue in Memphis.)

The gravest challenge: Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar at WWE’s WrestleMania 27?

October 25th, 2010 2 comments

Dead to rights: Undertaker takes Lesnar to Hell in a Cell and back in 2002.

UPDATE: Earlier today, UFC president Dana White did an about-face from his previous comments made Saturday night (posted below) when asked by TMZ about the Lesnar/’Taker stare down, saying, “Brock Lesnar is still under contract with the UFC…  he is not going to wrestle in the WWE. He cannot wrestle, box or fight anywhere else.” That certainly doesn’t mean it was a shoot on ‘Taker’s part–it could be he saw an opening for some publicity and took it. (The guy’s been one of the best storytellers in the ring over the past 18 years and a born showman.)

In that sense, it worked out well for ‘Taker and McMahon as it has a lot of people talking about WWE today. The sad part is, the impromptu footage shot Saturday night is far more riveting than anything WWE has scripted in months. Still, it’s a bit strange White didn’t immediately shoot it down when asked about it Saturday night, but maybe he felt he didn’t need to seriously address it at the time. The story really picked up steam over the last two days, prompting White’s statement.

Following Brock Lensnar’s UFC title loss to Cain Velasquez Saturday night, the battered, bruised former champion had an all-too-convenient brief confrontation with an out-of-character Undertaker (Mark Calaway), leading to speculation of a showdown between the two ex-WWE titlists at WrestleMania 27 in Atlanta. (Ironically enough, both ‘Taker and now Lesnar have been left in vegetative states recently by Kane and Cain, respectively.) If it’s indeed a work (and I believe it is), it was beautifully executed and could develop into one of those classic angles that people talk about for years.

Perhaps it won’t lead to an actual match between the two, but it sure has people talking, which may have been the purpose of the exchange. However, Dutch Mantell, who helped mentor a young Calaway (who was working Memphis in 1989 as the Master of Pain) seems to believe the deal for the two to work together has already been made, saying, “I don’t believe ‘Taker did this without Vinny Mac’s knowledge. I think it would do one hellua buy rate…and money talks. I don’t think ‘Taker just goes off on a whim and makes statements like that without a reason and without authorization. Believe me, it has a purpose. It’s not a ‘swerve’ for the sake of a swerve. It’s for the sake of business.” Personally, in my experiences, if anything involving a pro wrestler looks like a work, it most likely is.

The Floyd Mayweather Jr. angle didn’t hurt the boxer’s credibility in the end like some critics speculated, so I absolutely believe Lesnar could do the WWE match without losing his edge in the UFC fans’ eyes. Lesnar’s been an open critic of WWE and its traveling sideshow lifestyle but if the money were right, I think he’d come back for one night only. All that negative talk and supposed heat between he and Vince McMahon could merely be incorporated into the angle. Given that ‘Taker has long been the leader of the WWE dressing room, he probably didn’t appreciate Lesnar turning his back on the business after McMahon made him a star; however, that was seven years ago. Whatever animosity once existed between Lesnar and WWE could easily be put aside for the sake of business–and perhaps a record-breaking PPV buy rate.

Even UFC president Dana White didn’t rule out the possibility of a Lesnar/’Taker WWE bout (around the 2:20 mark), speculating that it was merely a work between two friends.

Not everyone agrees–Matt Hardy voiced his opinion this morning, claiming that there’s no way Brock would come back to WWE.

Lesnar and Undertaker did work together multiple times in 2002-03, most notably at Hell in a Cell in 2002 and in a Biker Chain Match at the No Mercy PPV in 2003.