Scott Bowden presents Kentucky Fried Rasslin

Blood feast: The horror of the ongoing Hogan vs. Flair feud.

File under Ric Flair returns  to the ring in TNA.

“It’s a little sad to watch a fall from greatness….”

And so begins film critic Roger Ebert’s review of “Halloween II,” the 1981 sequel to one of the best horror films and one of the highest-grossing independent films ever made. The Ebert review goes on to quote John McCarty, author of the book “Splatter Movie,” who claimed the forces driving the splatter genre  “aim not to scare their audiences, necessarily, nor to drive them to the edge of their seats in suspense, but to mortify them with scenes of explicit gore. In splatter movies, mutilation is indeed the message-and many times the only one.” The longtime Chicago Sun-Times critic closed his review of the slasher sequel by saying, “…Halloween II is a retread of Halloween without that movie’s craft and exquisite timing.”

I was reminded of those words recently during the March 8 iMPACT main event featuring Hulk Hogan and Abyss vs. A.J. Styles and Ric Flair.

When Jerry Jarrett and I spoke earlier this week regarding the death of Corsica Joe, the subject eventually turned to TNA and the abysmal 1.0 rating in their first week going head to head with the WWE juggernaut. When he asked what I thought about the promotion building around the Hulkster and the Nature Boy in 2010, I blurted out, “Flair was one of my idols when I was a kid. I was saddened to see he and Hogan cut their heads off Monday and flop around like broken-down shells of their former selves. This isn’t the way I want to remember my hero.”

In quite possibly the publication's only nonfiction story of the year, the spring 1978 issue of The Wrestler touts young Flair as a future World champion.

I’ll never forget the first time I saw Ric Flair in early 1978. I was nearly 7 years old and about to take yet another step from casual fan to hardcore mark. Months earlier, I had been living and dying with the drama unfolding in Memphis during the first-ever series of bouts between Jerry “the King” Lawler and “Superstar” Bill Dundee. Along with the release of STAR WARS and the death of Elvis Presley, my discovery of Memphis rasslin’ is the most vivid of that year of my young life.

I was watching another staple of my childhood, an episode of CHARLIE’S ANGELS, which featured an unsavory character-I believe an ex-grappler-reading a wrestling magazine. I was unaware of the existence of wrestling magazines-apparently I was so hell-bent on getting my grubby hands on the latest Spider-Man, Hulk or Fantastic Four comic book that I never noticed the magazine rack.

I begged my dad to take me to 7-11 to investigate and, sure enough, there was Ric Flair on the cover of the spring 1978 issue of the Best of the Wrestler.

Although over the years I would slowly figure out that most of the Apter mag stories were pure fiction, the headline on that Flair cover story proved to be quite prophetic — “The Experts Declare: Ric Flair is the Next Champion.” Flair may not have been the next World champion, but he did go on to rewrite the record book, capturing, depending on whom you believe, 16, 18-as high more than 21-World titles. I pretty much stopped counting after the seventh (eighth, if you count the New Zealand quickies with Harley Race) title win over Sting in East Rutherford N.Y. — the first of many times Ric came back to win the gold after seemingly being forced out to make room for the next new superstar in the business.

I became a regular reader of the Apter mags in the ’70s and ’80s and did my best to follow the storylines taking place around the country. Although I couldn’t see Flair wrestle on TV or in person, that made him larger than life to me, especially when I read that he’d won the NWA World title from Dusty Rhodes in Kansas City in 1981.

Equally as memorable as that introduction to Flair via wrestling journalism — the first time I saw Slick Ric wrestle on TV. When Flair showed up unannounced in the WMC-TV 5 Studio on August 14, 1982, I remember being terribly excited, calling my friends on the telephone and urging them to hurry over. We huddled around the TV in nervous excitement as Lawler masterfully goaded Flair into an impromptu NWA World title match. Sure, Nick Bockwinkel, the AWA World champ, played the role well and most Memphis fans believed him to be the champion, but we Apter-reading marks knew that the NWA strap was considered the big one by the prestigious wrestling press (cough). Dressed in a perfectly pressed double-breasted, navy-blue blazer and starched white button-down and khakis, Flair almost appeared as if he had steered his yacht down the Mississippi River to arrive in Memphis. In hindsight, I love how Flair gives the city and announcer Lance Russell repeated backhanded compliments, speaking methodically without a trace of sarcasm as he explained that he’d heard that Memphis was full of nothing but rednecks and he was pleasantly surprised to see otherwise. Ironically enough, Flair was actually born in Memphis, a fact I was stunned to learn years later. Oh, what might have been had Flair grown up in Memphis and come up through the local promotion at the same time as the man who would be King.

Lawler, riding high after the Andy Kaufman angle earlier in the year, humbly says that he’s not in Flair’s class and puts the Champ on the spot with a challenge. In one of the best performances of his career — which is saying a lot — Russell perfectly plays the role of the small-time announcer. He’s almost in awe of Flair’s presence, going so far as to comment on the Nature Boy’s “stunning watch.” I also like how Russell lowers his head when Lawler asks if Flair’s scheduled opponent, Rick McCord, has ever won a match. Lance quietly answers, “Well, Jerry … I don’t remember it if he if did.”

During the brief bout, I recall my friends and me marking out when Lawler traps Flair in the sleeper hold, with me screaming, “He’s got him! He’s got him!” It was clear to all of us that Lawler was the better wrestler when Flair ran off to keep his title after one of those devastating fistdrops. (Always funny to me to hear Lawler knock Flair for his chops, when his finishing move was a flying punch off the ropes.)

I was so convinced that an injustice had been done on that day in 1982 that I fired off a letter to Bill Apter proclaiming the King to be the uncrowned World champion. Lawler’s apparent good showing, though, was vintage Flair, making the local star appear unbeatable at his own expense. And, in the aftermath, when Flair accuses Lance of being in on the plan to embarrass him, Russell’s expression in response is priceless.

Of course, as the years went by, I saw Flair regularly defend his title on Mid-Atlantic Wrestling and World Class Championship Wrestling, which suddenly began appearing on TV prior to Jerry Jarrett’s and Lawler’s show at 11 a.m. I cheered as he regained the 10 pounds of gold from Harley Race at STARRCADE ’83. I rejoiced when Kerry Von Erich defeated Flair to win the belt for brother David and the entire state of Texas.

Stylin' and profilin': Another one of my favorite Flair T-shirts over the years.

In the mid-80s, when I began understanding what the business was all about, Flair supplanted Lawler as my favorite. To my dad, it seemed like I was always watching Ric Flair matches or interviews on our family’s big TV.

As the cocky goalkeeper for my high-school soccer team, I wore a Ric Flair T-shirt underneath my jersey for every game. One humid April night in 1989, I hastily left my nighttime soccer game, and still wearing my uniform, made it the Coliseum for a rare NWA show at the Coliseum just in time to see Ricky Steamboat defend Big Gold against Flair. The show only drew about 2,000 fans in the 11,364-seat arena, but Flair and Steamboat delivered an amazing 32-minute bout that was only slightly below their Chi-Town Rumble match in February of that year.

In my high-school graduation book, in the section devoted to future goals I want to accomplish, I wrote only: “To win the NWA World title from Ric Flair.” In college in 1991, I had T-shirts printed up declaring Pi Kappa Alpha “the real World champion of fraternities,” with an illustration of Flair (done by Kevin Lawler) wearing the World title belt featuring our Greek letters. I was wearing this T-shirt when I met Flair in the parking lot as he climbed into his rental car with Earl Hebner following a WWF show at the Pyramid Arena that same year. Upon hearing him say, “I love it!”, I literally gave him the shirt of my back in freezing temperatures-a gesture he seemed amused by.

The Four Horsemen of Bartlett High School (apparently making an appearance at a Bass Pro Shop).

When I broke into the business working for Jarrett and Lawler and eventually turned heel, I patterned myself after the Horsemen, always wearing starched button-downs and ties. One of the best compliments I received early on was from longtime wrestler Buddy Wayne, who rarely put over anybody or anything. (But you could always count on Buddy to tell you what was wrong with the business, which was usually followed by “… and I tell ya, it’s killin’ us, it’s killin’ us.”) He remarked that the way I dressed on TV made it seem like I was really somebody — not a wrestling manager with loud jackets and buffoonish, cheap shirts and slacks. In my mind, I was stylin’ and profilin.’

Wrestling would continue to change over the years, but Flair was the only thing that remained a constant. In some ways, he represented the last of the old-school era for most fans. Almost hard to believe that the two stars of that angle from August 1982 in Memphis were the only big-name territory guys still featured in Vince McMahon’s WWE heading into the 2008 WRESTLEMANIA event. Now only Lawler remains, but he’s not the same King I grew up with.

I had that feeling of being a kid again all over again during what was promised to be the last time I would watch Flair in a wrestling match. I had the words “Don’t be ashamed of those butterflies” in my head in response to my nervous stomach as I watched Flair walk that aisle for that  bout with Michaels. I popped early when Flair successfully made it off the top rope with a bodypress. I cringed when the bridge spot-which I’d seen Flair do with the likes of Steamboat, Barry Windham and Brad Armstrong so many times in the ’80s-didn’t quite work out. I almost believed that Flair might pull it off when HBK hesitated and gave Flair the advantage late in the bout.

And my eyes started welling up just a bit when HBK mouthed the words “I’m sorry. I love you”-what a beautiful way that would have been to close the final chapter of the most storied career in the business. HBK kept his word: He gave Flair exactly what he needed to have one last great match. Simply a tremendous performance put together by the Naitch and HBK. Flair, on the other hand, didn’t keep his word that Michaels would have the honor of his last match.

At the time, I felt that the shot of the long walk back to the dressing room for Flair after sharing the moment with his family would always be with me — it had the feel of Larry Bird’s retirement from basketball. Since that time, his son Reid has been arrested for heroin possession, while his daughter Ashley was picked up by police for allegedly assaulting her dad after a night of drinking. His latest wife, Jackie Beems, made headlines on TMZ for allegedly biting, kicking and punching the former champion.

The night after what was to be Flair’s final bout, in a sendoff never before seen for even the biggest of Vince McMahon’s creations, the Nature Boy, for years the franchise player for the WWF’s former promotional rival, was saluted by his peers and his family in touching fashion following Ric’s farewell address. Not only did we get Four Horsemen Tully Blanchard, Barry Windham, Arn Anderson, Dean Malenko and J.J. Dillion and former rivals Race, Steamboat and Greg Valentine, but we also got to see guys like HBK, Chris Jericho, Triple H and Edge give thanks to one of their childhood heroes. Big Show appeared to be in tears when he climbed on the ring apron, probably still reeling from Flair’s comments at the Hall of Fame that Show could own the business if he had his head screwed on straight.

The entire scene was poignant. I was truly touched. My wife, Hayley, leaned over looking for tears on my face, and I had to look away. Nearly 30 years to the day I first laid eyes on the Nature Boy on that magazine cover, I was saying goodbye. And thank you.

Hayley walked into our living room on March 8, to see a bloody Flair staggering around like a crazed maniac-straight out of a bad horror film. “Oh, my. Is that Ric?! That is sad,” she said. Yeah, but for altogether different reasons this time.

The Excellence of Communication: Bret and HBK bury the hatchet.

Radio host Michael Landsberg of “Off the Record” conducted a candid interview with Bret Hart, questioning his decision to return to WWE after pointedly declaring 10 years ago on the same program that he would “never” again work with Vince McMahon. Hart cites “fun” and “adventure” as the main reasons for his return.

“I didn’t go back because I had to have it or needed it,” he tells Landsberg. “I don’t have the schedule that the wrestlers have and just to have a bit part on the show. Hopefully, I’ll make some money, but it was never really about the money. Even when I talked to him [Vince McMahon], we didn’t bicker about what I was going to be paid. It was more what they would do with me and how we could make it fun. It was a big negative thinking about it for 13 years and being angry about what happened, and trying to take something negative and turn it into a positive.”

These comments reflect a sharp contrast to Bret’s feelings not long after brother Owen’s death, which he now accepts as “as an accident.”

Hart went on to say that he truly has mended fences with Shawn Michaels and maintains that what took place in the ring Jan. 4 on RAW was quite real-at least to him. (Interesting that Jerry Jarrett, who worked with HBK and the Hitman in the Former Fed in the mid-’90s, wrote on Jan. 5 that the fans may not realize just how real that segment was.)

“I think I took the first step and I think that meant something to him,” Hart says. “I honestly think they [McMahon and Michaels] had so much shame and guilt that they didn’t want to take that step. I think when I met Shawn that day and when I basically forgave him in the ring in front of everybody, it was far more real than people think it was. I know everything in wrestling seems like it’s all rehearsed or put on [in a funny moment, Landsberg intejects, “It is!”‘] but with Shawn that day, it was very sincere in the way we were talking to each other. The truth is that once I took all that weight off Shawn’s back, he’s been a better person to me, anyways, and we’ve kind of picked up where we left off and we’re like old friends, which is kind of strange.”

Hart didn’t speak so glowingly of Ric Flair and the Nature Boy’s return to the ring in TNA. (And if you saw Flair flopping around and bleeding like a stuck pig Monday night in the days following his assault at the manicured hands of his wife, Jackie Beems, it’s easy to understand Hart’s stance.)

“Ric Flair, I feel sorry for him. You were talking about wrestlers saying, ‘When is enough, enough? When do they ever give up and go home to their families and their real lives?’ Ric is one of those guys who’s a little ahead of me, but I remember a time knowing that I had to get out of wrestling and go home to my kids before they were grown up and gone or and that I had no family live. I think wrestlers make this decision-and I’m sure Hogan is the same and different guys-where they decide they have to go home to their families or stay in the wrestling business and that becomes their family. Flair stayed in the wrestling business, forgot about his family, his family moved on and left him; the only thing Ric Flair knows is the dressing room, the airports, the bar after, and drinking.”

His comments regarding Flair aren’t surprising since the two have had a stormy relationship that goes back to the “16-time” World champion’s first run in the WWF, with Hart suspecting that Flair purposely sabotaged some of their matches, including the Hitman’s first WWF title win in Saskatoon. The two have bickered back and forth for years, questioning the other’s greatness and, ironically enough, accusing each other of being too routine in their matches. (They both have a point in that regard.) Most of the boys have trouble adjusting to life off the road and out of the spotlight when their wrestling careers end. For years, they shared a love/hate relationship with the lifestyle as they traveled around the world entertaining strangers while their families sat home waiting for their fathers and husbands to return. Admittedly, Flair is, by all accounts, among the worst addicts to the biz; however, I would think Hart could him a little slack since he admits that the primary factor behind his WWE return was boredom. (Incidentally, as WWE prepared Flair’s elaborate exit nearly two years ago, several in the company voiced their concern over how Slick Ric would handle life at home-clearly, not well.) Although Hart’s affairs and vagabond lifestyle cost him his marriage in the end, given the chance, there’s no question the Hitman would do it all over again if he could.

For more excerpts from the interview, check out James Caldwell’s piece at the Torch, or listen to the audio at the Off the Record podcast site.

Forget about HBK-join the KFR “Klique”

To hell and back with HBK

The new WWE three-disc DVD release WWE: Shawn Michaels – My Journey
features more than 20 memorable bouts from HBK’s career, with interview segments with Michaels discussing each one, including the following:

• vs. Undertaker – WM 25
• vs. Undertaker – Casket match from Royal Rumble
• vs. Bulldog – One Night Only
• vs. Jericho – WM 19
• vs. Hart – IC Title from Canada
• vs. 1-2-3 Kid – Raw
•  vs. Mankind – Raw
• vs. Angle – WM 21

On select matches on the DVD, Cole and Michaels also provide alternate commentary, including the Hart bout, which could be interesting if HBK is candid.
The collection also includes early bouts in his career with partner Marty Jannetty, collectively known as the (Midnight) Rockers, against “Playboy Buddy Rose and Pretty Boy Doug Somers for the AWA tag titles and against The Nasty Boys. There’s even a World Class bout with Michaels getting squashed by the One Man Gang. Unfortunately, none of HBK’s heel stuff in Memphis Wrestling is included, which is a shame, as he displayed early on a natural heel charisma that would serve him well as he built a career in the World Wrestling Federation.

I wish I could say that I had Michaels pegged for superstardom all along. Sure, HBK was already more than capable in the ring in Memphis in 1987, my first exposure to the man who would become World Wrestling Entertainment’s most consistent big-match performer in history.

Maybe I couldn’t get past the mullet, dorky sunglasses and zebra-striped banda-essentials of his Midnight Rockers gimmick with partner Marty Jannetty, who together came off like cheap copies of the Rock ‘n’ Roll Express, Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson — the originators of the rock-band tag-team persona in Memphis. Even Morton and Gibson had trouble in Memphis matching the popularity of the Fabulous Ones, Steve Keirn and Stan Lane, in part because the Fabs’ gimmick had been on the scene first.

Although it was the Gagnes who initially pushed the duo in the struggling AWA, you can’t blame Verne for the dopey name. While Michaels concedes they were emulating Morton and Gibson, he says they weren’t consciously thinking of the Midnight Express, another top-notch tag-team of the mid-’80s era, when coming up the Midnight Rockers name. The Midnights — Bobby Eaton and Dennis Condrey — undoubtedly influenced the Rockers’ in-ring work, though, as the two longtime Memphis boys took tag-team wrestling to a new art form in the ’80s, working with Morton and Gibson to produce some of best tag matches of the decade.

Michaels for years has claimed that initially Verne balked at the name, thinking fans might misunderstand the term “Rockers” to mean rocking chairs. (Can’t imagine how Vince McMahon and his expanding WWF were outfoxing Verne in the ’80s.)

Michaels and Jannetty, two admitted hardcore partiers during that time, developed the name because they viewed the gimmick as an extension of their true selves. Getting loaded is one thing, but at least Micahels and Jannetty never endangered their lives or careers with the evil sin of smoking. At least, according to this public-service announcement.

For entrance music — which was becoming an art form in itself among the boys after guys like the Freebirds paved the way — the Rockers chose Judas Priest’s “Living After Midnight,” reflecting their lifestyle at the time.

Living after midnight, rockin’ to the dawn
Lovin til the morning, then I’m gone, I’m gone

I took the city bout 1 a.m, loaded, loaded
I’m all geared up to score again, loaded, loaded
I come alive in the neon light
That’s when I make my moves right

That nice slice of Judas cheese fit the two perfectly. In fact, while the Rockers were building a solid rep for their in-ring performance, highlighted by fantastic bouts with Rose and Somers (many of which were televised nationally on ESPN) their antics outside the ring had them living their gimmick too much.

During a run as AWA World tag title champions, Michaels and Jannetty finally got the call they’d been waiting on from Pat Patterson and the WWF. The Midnight Rockers dropped the belts in May 1987 and bolted for greener pastures under Vince’s circus tent. They lasted about a week.

Their perceived arrogance at their first and only WWF TV taping in 1987 made them immediately disliked in the locker room After a night of hard partying following a WWF show, which allegedly included property damage to the bar area, they were fired by Vince himself, who didn’t think the two were worth the trouble. Michaels has since claimed that wrestler Jimmy Jack Funk (Jesse Barr) unjustly stooged them off to the office out of jealously. As the firing story goes, Vince met with the Rockers, telling Michaels, “Nice boots. They’re made for walking.” Maybe that was just Mr. McMahon talking.

Suddenly limited in options, Michaels and Jannetty crawled back to the AWA, who had no choice but to take them back, as the group’s talent level was at an all-time low. Because the AWA wasn’t running many shows, the Rockers also begin appearing frequently in Memphis in fall 1987. At first, they were pushed as babyfaces, feuding with fellow rock ‘n’ roll rip-offs Mike Davis and Tommy Lane, the RPMs. TV announcer Lance Russell’s enthusiasm for their work was evident, strongly putting them over to the fans.

Although a far cry from its heyday, Memphis was still drawing decent crowds in 1987, between 3,500 and 5,500 fans at the Mid-South Coliseum on a weekly basis. Clearly, though, Michaels and Jannetty weren’t thrilled about being there. Supposedly, Bill Dundee locked the two out of the Nashville Sports Arena dressing room wearing only their tights in snowy conditions after listening to the Michaels and Jannetty complain about the drive on icy roads from Memphis.

Observing how much heat the Rockers had with the boys, the promotion slowly turned them heel, with the team finally caving to the overtures of unusual heel manager Mark Golleen, who quite possibly had the worst accent in wrestling history-which covers a lot of ground.

Bad attitudes or not, it didn’t affect their work, with the two new heels bringing the house down in bouts with the Nasty Boys who, of course, were tailor-made to be considered babyfaces in a territory like Memphis.

Michaels especially took to the new role, with his early heel interviews in Memphis a harbinger of his eventual singles character in WWF/E. To hype an AWA World tag title defense against local tag legends Jerry Lawler and Dundee, Michaels harped on the age of their opponents, calling them the “Over-the-Hill Gang” — which probably didn’t do them any favors legit behind the scenes. During the promo, Michaels also slyly acknowledges the heat they have in the back. I would have loved to have seen the look on Lawler’s face backstage during that promo. (Lawler was none too pleased with me when I hurled this insult at him in only my second interview as a pro: “The only reason Lawler’s not over the hill is because he never climbed it in the first place.” Incidentally, I lifted that line from the late, great Dan Shocket in the Apter mags.) Aw, well, Lawler has always maintained that personal issues draw money, so he probably got over it really quick.

Playing the heel in Memphis also enabled Michaels to emulate his hero, Ric Flair, taking exaggerated bumps when selling for the babyface’s comeback. The first time I saw Michaels wrestle in person, the Rockers had a great bout with the unlikely team of “Nightmare” Ken Wayne and Scott Hall. Wayne could more than keep up with the Rockers, as he’d had excellent tag bouts in the territory for years with former partner Danny Davis against the likes of Morton and Gibson. Hall couldn’t do much but simple power moves, for which the Rockers sold like crazy. The elevation on Michaels’ selling for a Hall backdrop would have made Flair envious.

At the time, I was only starting to grasp the business side of wrestling, but even then I knew that Shawn Michaels would be a star with the right gimmick. Admittedly, though, I didn’t foresee how much of a player he’d become.

In a move that would alter the future of Vince’s company, the WWF took the Rockers back in 1988, with the two practically begging for another shot. Their second TV debuts aired in June 1988, with the Rockers appearing on both of the Former Fed’s two syndicated shows at the time, WRESTLING CHALLENGE and SUPERSTARS OF WRESTLING. Vince shortened their name from the Midnight Rockers to the Rockers, but they kept the Judas Priest entrance song until new music could be tailored for the team.

The Rockers had a great run, despite being overshadowed a bit during a time when Vince was pushing juiced-up monsters in the prime spots. Still, they shined in the tag ranks, having great bouts with the Hart Foundation and Demolition. They actually won the WWF tag titles from Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart, but Vince changed his mind and the decision was reversed, with the official reason given on TV that the ring ropes had broken during the bout, creating an unsafe environment for the participants. Whatever.

Michaels’ big break came after Jannetty nearly got the two fired again, after learning the Legion of Doom was making more money than them for the same commercial shoot. In his book, Michaels says he pleaded with Vince not to fire him, saying he wanted to wrestle as a single anyway and was not leaving with Jannetty as a team to go to WCW, which had offered them a spot … at a significantly lower rate than they were already making. (Shrewd negotiator that Jannetty.)

Gotta credit Vince for realizing Shawn’s potential as a singles wrestler, helping to orchestrate one of the most memorable heel turns in WWF history.

Since that time — and four WWF/E heavyweight title reigns and one World title run later — Michaels has arguably been the company’s greatest performer.

Although he doesn’t take as many insane bumps as he used to, Michaels has showed no signs of slowing down, carrying younger stars like John Cena to some of the best matches of their careers. Michaels has a way of bringing out the best in everyone and making them appear like superstars, much like his hero Flair did in the role of the traveling NWA World champion in the territory days.

Following his upcoming WRESTLEMANIA rematch with Undertaker, Michaels will reportedly take an extended leave of absence, fueling rumors that he will lose the bout and his career forever. (“Forever” nowadays is kayfabe for “Until Summer Slam.”) No doubt that will help DVD sales.

You can purchase the new Michaels DVD below. (Your favorite rasslin’ Web site receives a small commission on each DVD sold, so you are encouraged to purchase several dozen copies for your family and friends.) I’ve also provided a link to the Memphis Wrestling DVD featuring the Rockers and the Rock ‘n’ Roll Express.